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REARING A SECOND
FAMILY
In our
local paper last Sunday and Tuesday there were different articles and
statistics concerning children that are being basically reared by their
grandparents. This means that they are rearing a second family. I am
fortunate enough to have 20 wonderful grandchildren. If an emergency
should arise, even though my dear wife has been dead almost 7 years now,
I would do my best to rear one or more of my
grandchildren. I hope that such emergency does not arise. But, the
majority of grandchildren being reared by their grandparents, are not
because of emergencies, but basically by the failure of their parents to
realize their own responsibility in the rearing of children that they
have brought into this world.
It seems from the many young people that I have talked to, that have
children, the major problems arise from the separation of the couple and
the leaving of the children primarily with their mother, a single mom,
who then has to go out and find a job to supply the needs of her
children. In doing so she has to leave her children with someone,
usually that someone turns out to be her mother and father.
Statistics tell us that there are 2.4 million grandparents nationwide
that are rearing or helping to rear their grandchildren. Alabama, my own
state, has 56,369 of this nationwide number of grandparents rearing or
helping to rear their grandchildren.
These separation of young parents come from the failure to recognize the
requirements that God calls for in a marriage. A marriage of a man and a
woman requires that such marriage is for life. God has created one man
for one woman for
life. Children are to be brought forth from this wedlock and from no
other source or activity. But yet, many young people are "shacking up"
together without marriage. Many times a pregnancy arises and the male
that is involved in this unholy
arrangement runs off and leaves the mother to either abort her expected
child or to bring it to term and into the world without a father present
to help see to its welfare. Most of the time such situation presents the
newborn to someone else to look after while the young mother looks for
and obtains work to pay for the child's necessities. The someone else is
usually the grandparents.
The presenting of a child or children to grandparents to look after and
help to rear usually comes from sin in some form being committed by one
or both of the parents. Divorce is sin, living together without being
married is sin, bringing children into the world and then not caring for
them is a sin. We know that this world in which we live is shot through
with sexual immorality. Such sexual immorality brings forth pregnancies.
These pregnancies, out of wedlock, usually bring forth abortions, which
is sin. Or a birth of a child without a father present to help care for
its needs, which too is sin.
Yes, grandparents who have already brought up and reared their own
family, are now called upon to help rear someone else's family. Young
people, please do not bring children into the world without being
prepared to care for them yourselves. Please keep yourselves pure
sexually until such time as you are married. Young men, if you father a
child whether in wedlock or out, it is your responsibility to furnish
the needs of the mother and child. Grandparents, I know that you love
your grandchildren dearly, in spite of how they were conceived and born
into this world, but please do not encourage your children to neglect
their personal responsibilities toward their own children by being there
to fulfill all the needs and desires of the young couple, or even the
separated couple. Young couples must learn to fulfill the needs of
children that they have brought into this world and we as grandparents
should not encourage them to do otherwise by always being there to
basically rear their children for them. Let the preachers of the land be
more forceful in their teaching on these responsibilities of young
couples to care for their own children.
-- Jim Sasser
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